I know we like being funny :) I am assuming you're hoping to actually
choose one of these names.  I am a very practical person, so perhaps my
suggestion is not all that exciting:

Division of Comprehensive Histological Serivices
(or department, unit, whatever...)

If it includes imaging/observation microscopy etc...then add Imaging to
the name ...

Maybe it will fuel the fire

Stephanie Moore
Brandeis University 
Waltham, Ma