The Ultimate Urban Legend (this one sums it up)
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From: | "MacDonald, Jennifer" <jmacdonald@sach.org> |
To: | "'histoner@pathology.swmed.edu'" <histoner@pathology.swmed.edu> |
Reply-To: | |
Content-Type: | text/plain |
> > The Ultimate Urban Legend
> >
> >
> > This covers all of those rumors and chain letters that are sent to us
> from
> > someone who has too little to do:
> >
> > I know this guy whose neighbor, a young man, was home recovering from
> > having been served a rat in his bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken. So
> > anyway, one day he went to sleep and when he awoke he was in his
> bathtub
> > and it was full of ice and he was sore all over. When he got out of the
> tub
> > he
> > realized that HIS KIDNEYS HAD BEEN STOLEN and he saw a note on his
> > mirror that said, "Call 911!" But he was afraid to use his phone
> > because it was connected to his computer, and there was a virus on his
> > computer that would destroy his hard drive if he opened an e-mail
> > entitled "Join the crew!"
> > He knew it wasn't a hoax because he himself was a computer
> > programmer who worked on software to save us from Armageddon when the
> > year 2000 rolled around. And it's a little known fact that the Y1K
> > problem caused the Dark Ages. His program prevented a global disaster
> > in which all the computers would get together and distribute the
> > $250.00 Neiman-Marcus cookie recipe under the leadership of Bill Gates.
> > (It's true - I read it all last week in a mass e-mail from BILL GATES
> > HIMSELF, who was also promising me a free Disney World vacation and
> > $5,000 if I would forward the e-mail to everyone I know.)
> >
> > The poor man then tried to call 911 from a pay phone to report his
> > missing kidneys, but reaching into the coin-return slot he got jabbed
> > with an HIV-infected needle around which was wrapped a note that said,
> > "Welcome to the world of AIDS." Luckily he was only a few blocks from
> > the hospital - the
> > one where that little boy who is dying of cancer is, the one whose last
> > wish is for everyone in the world to send him an e-mail and the
> > American Cancer Society has agreed to pay him a nickel for every
> e-mail
> > he receives. I sent him two e-mails and one of them was a bunch of x's
> > and o's in the
> > shape of an angel (if you get it and forward it to more than 10 people,
> > you will have good luck; but if you send it to only 10 people, you will
> > only have OK luck; and if you send it to less than 10 people, you will
> > have BAD LUCK FOR SEVEN YEARS). So anyway the poor guy tried to drive
> > himself to the hospital, but on the way he noticed another car driving
> > along without its lights on. To be helpful, he flashed his lights at
> > him and was promptly shot as part of a gang initiation.
> >
> > Send THIS to all the friends who send you their junk mail and you will
> > receive 4 green m&ms, but if you don't the owner of Proctor and Gamble
> > will report you to his Satanist friends and you will have more bad
> luck,
> > your wife will develop breast cancer from using the antiperspirant
> which
> > clogged the pores under her arms, and the U.S. government will put a
> tax
> > on your emails forever.
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
>
>
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